Asian American / Asian Students: Aspects of Social Interaction – Workshop 3-C

Loretta Chin: Alright, we’re going to get started. Thank you all for coming this afternoon. My name is Loretta Chin and I work at Brooklyn College.

I would like to introduce Dr. Maria Volpe and Ms. Marion Yuen. They are going to present the topic, “Managing Conflicts with Asian American Bicultural Lenses”. Maria Volpe is the Professor of Sociology. Dr. Volpe serves as the director of the dispute resolution program at the John Jay College of Criminal Justice, the City University of New York, and she is the convener of the CUNY Dispute Resolution Consortium, a university-wide project funded by the William [inaudible] foundation. She is an editorial board member of Conflict and Resolution Quarterly, she is a negotiation journal and practical dispute resolution member and past president of the Society of Professionals in Dispute Resolution. She is a member of the Dispute Resolution Advisory Committee of the New York State unified court system.

Dr. Volpe’s current research focuses on police use of mediation and dispute resolution processes, particularly mediation, and has been widely recognized for her distinguished career in the field of dispute resolution. Dr. Volpe received her PhD from New York University in 1981, where she was an NIMH fellow. The NIMH is the National Institute of Mental Health.

Ms. Marion Yuen is the president of the NYA group, is a communication advisor, researcher, and mediator. She serves as a mediator for the New York County Supreme Court Commercial Division, United States Postal Service, Internal Revenue Service, Brooklyn and Manhattan Mediation Centers, and NASD Dispute Resolution. Marion holds master’s degrees in Communications from Columbia University, Teacher’s College, and in Biophysics from the University of California at Berkeley, and a Bachelor’s degree in Physics from Wellesley College. Welcome and thank you.

Maria Volpe: Thank you. It’s a real pleasure to be here, and our being here is actually related to a project that we’re doing, so we come within a context. It was last summer that Marion came to one of our programs at John Jay, and after the program, said something like, “You know, I’m the only mediator with the US Postal Service Redress Program in the Northeast, and I’m wondering if you’d be interested in working with me to build some capacity among Asian Americans so that we could have greater presence in the mediation field.” And I thought, hmm, that’s another interesting challenge that I could take on, and so we exchanged some correspondence and thoughts and then I ran across a CUNY proposal to get funding to do diversity projects, and one night, banged away at a quick proposal, and we got funded. So we’re really thrilled that, now, this idea that began sort of as a vision of doing something, may actually come to fruition, and one of these days Marion won’t be the only mediator for the US Postal Service Redress Program of Asian-American heritage, that we in fact will have many CUNY students who will be skilled and feel comfortable in dealing with conflict using some of the skills and techniques that are gaining widespread publicity and acceptance in our society.

So, that’s sort of how we got here, and I think that I will probably see a lot more of us as we continue to, now, search for additional funding for this project to take it beyond what we got funded to do as a pilot program. And we have some handouts here that we’d like to share with you. Why don’t we give them to you at the end of the program, because we have a slide that goes with it at the very end. We are looking for 15 students to do one day intensive training and then build from that.

So I think that sort of tells you how we got here and what we’re interested in doing.

Marion Yuen: I want to start by [inaudible] this quote from Maya Angelou: “People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” To me, that gives me some assurance and encouragement that, when I’m faced with discrimination, I have some power over the situation, that I have power in me, in fact a lot of power in me, to influence my interaction with people and circumstances that may or may not be friendly to me.

Maria Volpe: I wanted to add to that. It’s not what people say or what people do; it’s not that it’s not important, because it is, we do remember what people say and what people do, but it’s interesting, when you talk to people after a particular experience, we sometimes forget exactly what people said and sometimes we forget exactly what we did, but we always have those feelings, like really frustrated, we just have a way of capturing the feelings. And Maya Angelou sort of captured that for us. I think maybe I would change it just a little bit, [inaudible], what people did, but how we make people feel really does stay with us.

They didn’t have enough power points for both sessions this afternoon, so we’ll convert our slides to overheads, so this is going to be a little awkward. We’re together for probably just about an hour, I have to go back to the college to do a training program for our security, so we may not get through all of this, but we’re aspiring to have a short, interactive workshop here, on how one’s experience with conflict is affected by being both Asian and American, and attention will be given to the following: tools for making talk work in diverse contexts, techniques to enhance comfort in anticipating and responding to potential conflict, and strategies for protecting oneself from overreacting to triggers, and the triggers can obviously vary depending on what we bring to a situation.

So, for starters, it’s usually helpful to do some introductions. I mean, you heard who we are when we got here, and we’re interested in knowing who you are, so if you could tell us your name and your affiliation either at CUNY or with CUNY, and do we want to know the Asian heritage? So, let’s start with you.

Female Audience Member: Sure. Hi, my name is Jane Hyun. I am Korean American, I was born in Korea, I came here when I was almost eight, so [inaudible], Thomas asked me to do a workshop for him for, about leadership issues for students going into the corporate world, so [inaudible]. Oh, I’m not from CUNY, actually, I don’t work at CUNY, I’m actually a corporate trainer and coach.

Edward Ma: My name is Ed Ma. Horse in China, it means. I was born in China, at Tsingtao, you know the beer, I moved to Taiwan when I was 15. When I was 29 or 30 I came to the U.S. to study surgery. [inaudible]. Anyway, [inaudible] at [inaudible] Hospital in Chinatown, [inaudible] and Chinese American Planning council, and also Community Board [inaudible]. [inaudible] resources in this area, and I’m very interested in student interaction. I’ve always wanted to be a student counselor, [inaudible].

Female Audience Member: Hi, I’m Alyssa Wong. I work with Russian students over at Kingsborough Community College. I am second generation, and I grew up in Brooklyn.

Female Audience Member: Uh, my name’s Jenny Huang. I’m not affiliated with CUNY [inaudible] last year, through an invitation, I don’t know where it came from, but I work with high school students on college counseling. I’m Taiwanese American, came here when I was 10.

Maria Volpe: Which high school, are you in a high school?

Jenny Huang: No, I actually, the organization’s name is Chinese American Planning Council and we serve [inaudible] schools around the city.

Female Audience Member: [inaudible] I came as a foreign student from Taiwan [inaudible]

Loretta Chin: My name is Loretta Chin, I’m working at Brooklyn College at Student Life. I’m Asian-American, I’m Chinese-American. I also know Dr. Volpe because through her, I received [inaudible] training at [inaudible], and I teach excellent students at Brooklyn College. In addition, I work with the Asian community extensively, this topic interests me very much because I [inaudible].

Maria Volpe: In this world of conflict, and what’s really fascinating is that at some point we want to say that we’re all the same and all that, but you know, it really does a make a difference who we are and what we bring to a situation. And some of the things that we bring get transmitted from generations that we’re not even aware of, at times. They get transmitted to our culture, through our traditions, and here we are like, sometimes even generations later, doing things that our ancestors did that you just not even consciously aware of. It’s just been passed down, “This is the food that we eat.” And we assume that this is, this is not the religion that we subscribe to, it’s just what’s been passed down. These are the ways in which we talk, some of us talk with our hands, you know, and just don’t even stop to think of where does it all come from. But every so often, when we bump up against someone how doesn’t do it our way, we begin to see some of the clashes, whether they are inter-generational…. I had a conversation earlier at lunch with Dr. Ma and Dr. Sung who talked about the inter-generational conflicts. Sometimes we bump up against it because we’re exposed to other experiences that our ancestors are, but they’ve also transmitted certain things that make us bump up against others, so our bicultural lenses get pretty complicated for us. And with the growing number of Asian American students on our campuses, we thought that it would be really useful to begin to address some of the uniqueness that gets brought to what we often say, the table, or to an experience.

I recently got an email from a law student at one of the law schools, not CUNY Law, in New York, was doing a paper around negotiation. But she wanted to explore what it meant to be an Asian American, because she felt that what she knew about negotiating was different than others and she wanted to explore it in greater depth. I’m eager to connect with her now that this semester is over, to see what she’s come up with. But it’s something that was really passionate and unique for her, that we sometimes don’t acknowledge or explore, that individuals do bring some differences to the table, and what are they, and how can we work with those unique features that are brought to the table.

I think since we are a small group, maybe we may want to modify this a little bit, [inaudible].

Marion Yuen: Sure, that’d be great, should we proceed with this? Yeah. So, let’s hear from volunteers here. What do you like most about being Asian American?

[laughter]

Jane Kim: [inaudible] my first choice, I want to pick a restaurant.

Ed Ma: [inaudible] complain about the work, and [inaudible], Asian, Chinese, Caucasian, she always complain about [inaudible]. And one day her Jewish colleague said, [inaudible] Chinese way, [inaudible] American way, [inaudible], how come [inaudible]? Sometimes you have a double standard, you want to be American [inaudible] we always flip flop [inaudible]. This is very interesting, I was very confused when I came here, [inaudible]. [inaudible].

Maria Volpe: So it sounds like, one of the things that you like, are the values, maybe of having the traditions that are honorable in that, you feel comfortable with them.

Marion Yuen: The other thing I hear is also your self-acceptance.

Edward Ma: Yes, yes, this is very important. [inaudible], I don’t know, confused, [inaudible].

Maria Volpe: It’s great to be able to reflect back and to see where you had conflicts with certain traditions before that you now feel proud of or comfortable with. And sometimes it’s only at different points in life that we feel comfortable with certain things, and it’s not surprising that some of the inter-generational stuff will shake itself out when that ten year old becomes a 50 year old.

Edward Ma: [inaudible]

[laughter and random chatter]

Maria Volpe: Does someone have a magic marker? They gave us, [inaudible].

Loretta Chin: I’m proud of the Asian history. Our civilization is the oldest, there are many things that people don’t know about us, the things that we’ve invented, our system, the art, the culture, the food, all of that, it’s very advanced, and you know a lot of people are very ignorant about that. Maybe that’s also one of my most annoying experiences.

Maria Volpe: We’ll get to that next [laughter].

Loretta Chin: I’m very proud of our [inaudible] as a people, also that we don’t start a lot of wars. I look at history, and I study at history, and there’s been a lot of violence, maybe I don’t know a lot about wars if there are wars, but I don’t, [inaudible] read a lot, maybe I’m not being educated, [inaudible] but I haven’t heard about wars with China and other countries [inaudible], and so that’s also a good thing.

Maria Volpe: Okay, so I’m gonna add a [inaudible] more peaceful past. I guess [inaudible], have the Chinese been aggressors, have they [inaudible].

Female Audience Member: It’s interesting, I mean now you ask that question, I think of myself as an Asian, or think of myself as an American, it’s sort of the very first time I’ve been ask to really, consciously reflect on myself being an Asian American, two words together. And when you say Asian history, I say “Yeah, that’s my Asian pride.” When I say that, I’m saying it as an Asian coming from [inaudible], I’m proud because of my history. But then, when you say American I think of more general terms, in terms of things that apply to America as a country, America as a society. So it’s really, I don’t know….

Maria Volpe: How long did you say you’ve been in the U.S.?

Female Audience Member: Since ’87, so my whole childhood was here.

Loretta Chin: I just wanted to mention, I think I’m focusing on China’s history, rather than Asian, with Asian, yes, there have been wars, right?

Maria Volpe: What’s interesting is, and this probably isn’t very fair, and Mary and I have [inaudible], when we talk about Asian American, we’re making it sound like it’s a monolithic group, but it’s not, I mean, as we evolve with some of this hyphenation here, we’re going to, as a culture, have to deal with it. European Americans, is a German like an Italian? Are all Asians alike? They aren’t. So there’s going to be, there will also be conflicts between the various Asian groups as well. I mean we’re going to see some of that, like what we’re now seeing with some of the Latino groups. For those that think Puerto Ricans and Dominicans are in a wonderfully [inaudible], there’s some major clashes, groups are not the same, and I think we’ll begin to see more of that with Asians as well.

Female Audience Member: I think that goes back to what Dr. Ma was saying about self-acceptance. If we can accept ourselves, then it will be easier for us to accept other people, so I don’t know a whole lot about Korean culture, but if I’m confident about myself, it’s a lot easier for me to work on any conflict I might have with you.

Maria Volpe: So, Professor [Lee], are you going to share with us, let’s see, part of this is the challenge of dealing with this term Asian American, and I think we also struggled with whether we should say Asian American/Asian, which is what the institute has done, it’s actually increased the title of its names so that it could deal with some of the cultural divides here. So, use Asian as your framework, that’s okay.

Female Audience Member #2: [inaudible]. Positive things sort of relating to Asian.

Female Audience Member #3: It’s real interesting. [inaudible] She mentioned that, when you look at what is Asian, what is Asian American, and in my mind, [inaudible] about being an Asian, all the bad things about being an Asian, I have to step back and think, well, Asian American, what does that mean, because I am feeling that struggle now, as far as I’m definitely more Americanized, because I’ve been here longer, but first thing we talk about Asian Americans, the first thing that comes to mind is [inaudible] an Asian. So I think going back to what people wrote, I think the best thing about being an Asian American, I can take the best of both worlds. One of the things I have to say about Asian culture is the respect that people have for each other, about your family, that’s also a big part, that’s also the most annoying, [inaudible].
But, yeah, I can just take any of those values from both cultures which are better [inaudible].

Maria Volpe: Right, well, thank you.

Female Audience Member: [inaudible] how individuals feel about labeling themselves Asian, Asian American, or really just American. [inaudible] similar cultural [inaudible] Asian, Asian American, American of Asian descent. I think it’s really neat [inaudible]

Maria Volpe: We had two people come in after we started. It’s okay, I just wanted to, we have been talking about what we like most about being an Asian American. Any thoughts? Either one of you?

Female Audience Member #4: Well, I’m sort of stuck by Asian American terminology. Because obviously I’m Asian American. I think I’m American, but I’m mostly Chinese, I’m American born. I guess what I like most about being who I am is the fact that there is so much intrigue and so much knowledge to be gained by who we are, and it’s just fascinating.

Female Audience Member: And the values that we bring.

Female Audience Member #4: And the values that go into the culture.

Ed Ma: Excuse me, [inaudible], I suggest you stay longer, [inaudible]. [incomprehensible]

[laughter and random conversation]

Maria Volpe: So there probably are many more things that we like about our past in addition to values of acceptance, history, art, culture, food, peaceful past, notion of seeming smart, respectful, family, intrigue, and as an Italian American, I can relate to a lot of, all of this. The nitty-gritty is a little different, because we have a frame of reference to a different group, but some of this is pretty similar. My parents were born in Italy, I’ve gone through this bicultural experience. The first time I realized I was American is when I went to Italy after I graduated from college, for the first time. People in my parents’ hometown were wondering who these Americans are who came. And all of my life, kids were referring to my sister and me as Italians, and I didn’t quite have this frame of reference of being only American, told they’re referring to us, because we were born in the U.S., as American. So I think that many groups go through similar experiences in not being able to speak the language, my first language was Italian, and my parents insisted on speaking their native language, being embarrassed speaking the language in front of your peers, you know, why do we have to be the only ones whose parents don’t speak English, and we’re speaking Italian, kids making fun of us. Many groups go through many of, we can go on and on, and your food, is it better, is it not, etc., etc. My own way [inaudible] the kinds of things that make us both proud, but now also become some of those annoying moments in our lives. Marion, do you want to…

Marion Yuen: So, what about some things that are annoying, what’s the most annoying experience.

Female Audience Member #2: Going back to respect your family, it’s wonderful to respect your elders, it’s another to make wrongful choices for yourself in that respect, and the same idea about family, I think to stay within the family, there’s a strong commitment to the family, but at the same time, also [inaudible] sacrifice, like I said, I work with high school students, I see a lot of their own personal sacrifices and wrongful choices in their connections to their family. So….

Maria Volpe: The kinds of choices, the kinds of commitments, the kinds of over-bearingness, we have to do it for them.

Female Audience Member #2: It’s highly [inaudible]. I mean, right now we see in America, the value of family is fading, and so that is very important, but I think for the Asian culture to [inaudible] the newer immigrants, they need to conservate that setting a little bit.

Maria Volpe: What happens to people when they make wrongful choices because of family?

Female Audience Member #2: What happens? I think missed opportunities, personal growth, what else, [inaudible].

Marion Yuen: How do you feel about these wrongful choices?

Female Audience Member #2: Well, some are, I think some are ignorant of them, they make choices in thinking it’s the best for the family without giving thoughts themselves. There is, often that leads to depression, and other negative consequences. So I have students who are suicidal, or who are depressed, who run away from home, recognize that they need to make this decision, [inaudible], so it’s better for them to run away from the decision or take the negative consequence.

Female Audience Member: And when one is depressed, when one is angry, when one is ambivalent, then that’s when one gets into trouble with other people.

Female Audience Member #3: I feel like my social role is not integrated in that, I have Asian friends, because they like hanging out with other Asians, I like spending time with them as well, you have non-Asian friends, you have all these different camps of people that you have in your world, and they’re not all always integrated, whereas if you’re Caucasian or some other mainstream, you just have friends, right, and they all belong to the world without having these parts, this kind of schizophrenia a little bit, running around your head. So that’s hard to manage, and a lot of work.

Loretta Chin: I’m kind of a little bit opposite that way, because I have an integrated social life, and not so much with my own group because I was raised in Brooklyn, by Brooklyn College for the last 30 years, I experienced all groups, but what I found frustrating because of that, because of what I knew about other groups is that I didn’t see Asian Americans having their place in an equal way in society and in participation, and I found that very annoying.

Maria Volpe: Okay, so yours was the limited access to Asian, is it college culture, would that..

Loretta Chin: Well, I lived an integrated social life. I did have Asian exposure, but I had it equally with everyone else, so a little bit different dynamics.

Marion Yuen: So your frustration is that sort of aspects of Asian..

Loretta Chin: Because of my social integration, I understand a lot more about other groups’ opportunities and their history and their interaction in society, and I don’t see that in the Asian American group, as being in that same. There’s so many dynamics within the civil rights era, for instance, the things that happened, different degrees for different groups, very complex.

Female Audience Member: So you wish the Asian American community knew more about that, or do you, I want to understand your frustration or your annoyance a little bit more.

Loretta Chin: Well, for instance, I’d like to see Asian Studies in college [inaudible]. And, just participation in society, civic in life.

Ed Ma: I have two frustrations. My in-law, my father in-law, [inaudible]. Very critical, very negative. Another frustration is about [inaudible].

So this is what the, [inaudible] Asian American interest in the community, instead of [inaudible], it’s always Chinatown, [inaudible], it’s very frustrating, and I work very hard trying to focus on [Chinatown].

Maria Volpe: Do you find that experience among the immigrant population or would it be second generation also. Because I know the Italian Americans have done the same, they talk about going home, [inaudible]. But as you begin to move on to the next generation that has fewer ties to the home country, it may be a factor of the immigrant culture that you’re experiencing.

Ed Ma: It’s much less [inaudible]. They become interested in politics, in China, in Taiwan, in Hong Kong, [inaudible]. More than here, they don’t care. [inaudible] a thousand dollars, go back to Taiwan and vote. [inaudible] my mother wanted me to go shopping, so I went shopping [inaudible].

Maria Volpe: Well, what’s interesting is that the reason for not voting are very different. One is because it’s [inaudible], the other one has a frame of reference and is very different, so, that’s very different.

Ed Ma: [inaudible]

Female Audience Member #4: My question was whether or not there is some relevance or influence of the factualism of what group is in the Hong Kong camp or the Taiwanese camp or the Mainland China camp, whether or not it has to do with those governments, those respective governments’ infusion of financial support to these various businessmen or other government agencies that are located in the community, and that’s why that is…

Ed Ma: The rumors are not totally true, but they’re probably true [inaudible].

Marion Yuen: What I’m hearing from the two of you is really that some of us, because of the transition from the homeland to here, is orientation. Where do we belong? I mean, voting reflects where you belong, I vote because this is community. So, perhaps a young person, I don’t have a lot of say here, I don’t know what’s going on, I don’t vote, whereas this other person from the old country is like, I don’t belong here, I’m just here for a short while. So it’s surely this orientation and a lot of us go through that transition because of the immigrant passage.

Maria Volpe: What’s really interesting is that this begins to show us where some of the sources of the conflicts begin to come up. Sometimes we’re aware of them and sometimes they’re just part of what we deal with everyday, and sometimes we sit down and have this kind of discussion, that we begin to see where some of our differences begin to surface both within our groups and with other groups. [inaudible].

Marion Yuen: What images come to your mind when you hear the word conflict?

Female Audience Member: Argument.

Marion Yuen: Argument. Someone else?

Female Audience Member: Images only? Volume.

Marion Yuen: Loudness. Sure.

Female Audience Member: Distress, emotional distress…

Female Audience Member: Hate.

Ed Ma: [inaudible], and development, opportunities and property. [inaudible].

Maria Volpe: Well, the Chinese symbol for conflict and crisis consists of “danger” and “opportunity”, and we use that a lot in all kinds of conflict resolution training, so it’s interesting that you surfaced the opportunity part of conflict. Because when we do this with other groups, usually, we get a very, very negative picture. Now, we’re obviously really pressed for time here, but the images that come into mind when you think of conflict are negative. Did any of these feel like part, resonate with Asian, Asian American culture? I mean, does conflict feel differently as a result of…

Female Audience Member: Actually, how many people here are bilingual? So in each language, there are probably several words for the word conflict right?

Ed Ma: You just mentioned, I feel shame, I feel ashamed when people in the subway talk too loud. People [inaudible], in public surroundings, in the subway, I feel so small [inaudible].

Marion Yuen: Humiliation is associated with conflict.

Ed Ma: You know, the talking is too loud, [inaudible]. [inaudible] different public health habits, not covering the mouth when coughing, [inaudible] very, very uncomfortable.

Maria Volpe: So that’s something really interesting in that high volume that’s associated with conflict is not something that is part of, perhaps, [inaudible].

Ed Ma: [inaudible]

Maria Volpe: But in Asian culture you would say the volume is lower.

Ed Ma: Yes. [inaudible]

Marion Yuen: This exercise, if we have more time, we will probably do it in different languages as well, because I think that once you explore that, you will see how different ways the whole conflict comes out. And that’s what we would like to do in our daylong training that we’re going to talk about for the students, because that helps bring to surface contradictory emotions, positive, negative, this way, that way, loyalty, sacrifice, anger, happiness, all of it.

Maria Volpe: Maybe we should [inaudible]. To bring home to all of us, that when we look at an object, an image there, we don’t all see the same thing. What do some of you see?

Female Audience Member: I see [inaudible].

[inaudible]

Maria Volpe: Okay, so which one do you see.

Female Audience Member: I see a man with glasses.

Maria Volpe: Okay, a man with glasses, is that what those who are seeing one see?

Female Audience Member: I saw the lion first, then I saw the face.

Maria Volpe: What’s important for us in the conflict resolution field is to always keep reminding ourselves that there are two sides to virtually everything, and sometimes it takes time to see the other side, and sometimes it requires a lot of creative energy and resources. I mean, here we did it pretty quickly, but sometimes it could take a long time, and when we’re dealing with differences across cultures, it takes forever to really understand where someone else is coming from, to see it their way. And we brought another one [inaudible], try out.
Okay, so who wants to help out? What are you seeing?

Female Audience Member: A rabbit, and a bird.

Maria Volpe: What’s always great is, when we do these, there’s always someone who goes, “ahhh”, and smiles. I wish we could get ourselves to a point, where we have conflict with others, to actually do the same thing, to replicate that “ahhh, that’s how they’re seeing it, oh, there it is”. We don’t do that, we get caught up with thes win/lose stuff, at any cost I’m gonna get them. We get caught up with the, “gotcha, I got you” [inaudible]. Instead, here, we’re trying to find more collaborative ways of making sure that everyone, in a creative way, finds out what the other side is seeing. We don’t do that in conflict situations, we tend…and it does require some technique, skills, time, patience, even optimism.

What are some of the qualities that we need to be able to deal with our differences with each other, and sometimes I’m really struggling with things like, how do we teach optimism. How do we teach people to believe that this, too, can get worked out, that there might be a positive outcome, that there might be something coming out of it that may not be all that you thought you might get out of it, that it’s not going to be 100%, that sometimes, yeah, you’re only going to get 70%, but that’s okay. How do we teach people to get to that point? And I think that that really does require a lot of shifts, paradigm shifts in how we think about conflict, the differences that we have with each other, and the many ways there are in which to resolve, maybe not to resolve, but to manage conflicts. I think resolution may be too aspirational.

We’re going to resolve conflict? I think we just set the stage for the next time, we wanted to be very careful that we set the appropriate space, when we run into the person next time, it’s not angry, hostile scene. I think we can learn those kinds of things, and how do we do it incrementally.

I see that some of my students who ended up in conflict resolution classes by accident, it was the only class that was available, it was something that was required somewhere else, they’re there because of something else other than they want to be there. But in the process of putting up with the course work, they actually become slightly transformed in their thinking, and I think it’s only because we repeated it over the course of a semester or a year for those who continue with our program. If it was a one shot thing, resolving or managing a conflict is not an event, it’s a process. And we have to learn how to hang in there, and that’s really hard, and I think one becomes more comfortable with it as one gets reminded over the course of time, that there are other ways to deal with it. I know we’re also running over here, and we need to hurry. Unfortunately, I think we brought a lot more than we had time for. Can you get those folders?

What we’re really hoping to do is to do a one day program with Asian American students to pique their interests in finding ways to deal with conflict through their bicultural lenses. Hopefully the process will be more elicitive than restrictive. A lot of the things we are told to do tend to be very Western, they don’t feel comfortable. Well, what do we bring to the table from our own cultures that we can work with. And so, on June 1^st, we’re looking to pull together about 15 students and we’re going to hold it at John Jay so that students can feel more comfortable dealing with conflict, themselves, with others, within their groups, with other groups, so they can feel more comfortable at the workplace, at home, at school. And we’re hoping to grow it so that those who are really interested will then be able to participate in, for example, mediation training, and they can actually be like Marion, where this all started, [inaudible]. Do you want to pass some of those around?

Female Audience Member: [inaudible] my class, only 13 students, and only two from Asian background [inaudible], they feel the need to…

Marion Yuen: And after this first round, maybe we could talk about Brooklyn College and so forth. And actually, Chinatown Planning Council, I had talked to David about this… [inaudible]

Female Audience Member #2: That’s an issue where we have a lot of students, they get picked on, they come, [inaudible]. So that also leads to real negative emotional possibilities. [inaudible]. So I think it’s a very [inaudible].

Maria Volpe: Yeah, I think we’re proceeding pretty slowly and cautiously here with a small group, and so there’s a sense of comfort around dealing with conflict. A lot of people really get turned off by the whole word conflict, they don’t have it or they don’t want to deal with it, it’s too messy, just do it their way, shouting out or avoiding or whatever it is that individuals do, so we’re going to start with a one day and see who out of that group self-selects for future training.

Marion Yuen: I feel they will train the first group of students so that those students can come work with the high school students. That’s what we would like to do.

Female Audience Member: Were the 15 students interested? Would they be interested in doing it again?

Maria Volpe: Possibly, yeah, I mean….

Marion Yuen: Actually, we actually have a full program of several groups, and they’re trying to raise money for that, so right now we’re just doing one to help us develop the curriculum, and also because of the small amount of money that CUNY gave us. We’re actually looking to do a fuller program with CUNY students in general.
Ed Ma: [inaudible]

Maria Volpe: I guess we have an awful lot of work ahead of us in terms of dealing with how groups deal with us, how we deal with others, but that’s, that’s an important [inaudible].

Loretta Chin: So I guess this is going to close our session, we’re going downstairs to join the main group, thank you Dr. Volpe, and also thank you Dr. Yuen.